She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
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Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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