The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
