it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize