So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
