it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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