oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
