I puked a lego.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
that's an acceptable place to lick
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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