I accidentally burped into my bong.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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