I accidentally had phone sex last night
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize