Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
