tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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