Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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