i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
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she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
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Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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