Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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