is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down