I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize