if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
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do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
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Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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