I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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