Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
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There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life