he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
