this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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