hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize