He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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