We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I just had sex on a roof
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I love you.
Bad choice
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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