I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
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We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
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My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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