Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
