Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Randomize
