Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(407): View more from Florida

I'm so fucking centered right now

Fav 3 1752 854
share tweet
(318): View more from Louisiana

i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy

Fav 26 1664 895
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.

Fav 19 7598 1489
share tweet
(504): View more from Louisiana

she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?

Fav 30 9466 1566
share tweet
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(617): View more from Massachusetts

It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.

Fav 3 1249 3268
share tweet
(443): View more from Maryland

and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp

Fav 32 2293 4808
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.

Fav 14 2011 2918
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(310): View more from California

I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected

(1-310): View more from California

Only you would come out as bi like that

Fav 2 1023 528
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(216): View more from Ohio

I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it

Fav 4 441 200
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT