Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.