that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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