Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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