Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize