Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize