You really coming over, don't trick.
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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