Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
