i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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