just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
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Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
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I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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