I wanna passion pit in your ass
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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