looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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