i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
