Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize