WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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