i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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