Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
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All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
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We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.