Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize