My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Help. Why am I so naked?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
