drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize