Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?