i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...