Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
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Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!