quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize