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• (917): View more from New York City

  I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike

  (1-917): View more from New York City

  this is mike. we're done.

  Fav 21 1120 3265

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• (516): View more from New York

  you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane

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• (207): View more from Maine

  I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?

  Fav 50 1189 3138

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me

  Fav 6 3125 919

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• 

  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (917): View more from New York City

  i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab

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• (713): View more from Texas

  He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.

  Fav 23 7569 1321

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• (408): View more from California

  I don't have enough holes for all these australians

  Fav 13 6283 1677

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• (951): View more from California

  I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things

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• 

  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (250): View more from British Columbia

  im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  ....you got kicked INTO a party??

  Fav 2 1122 534

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• (518): View more from New York

  Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.

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