it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask