Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Randomize
